Perhaps it’s human nature to want something or someone we can’t have. From little things to big ones, sometimes, there’s this something that we want but just can’t have. The same thing goes with people. Let’s be honest, there is (or there was) this someone we’ve been wanting to be with but can’t, right?
If there’s one thing I’ve learned about my crazy heart, it’s that it never gets to choose who to love. Never. It just, well, I don’t know. It just loves. Sometimes we’re lucky to be loved in return but other times, not so. We sometimes get into this sadder kind of love. We fall for people who don’t love us the same way. Or don’t love us at all.
When this sad moment happens to us, our worlds just seem to stop. It cuts us deep. We feel helpless. Our lives are shattered. Our minds are warped. Our hearts hurt. Our souls in pieces. So what do we do?
We all have different ways of dealing with matters of the heart like the pain of loving someone we can’t have. I’ve experienced this just once but it took me quite a while to put myself together and get through it. But I did! So I’m sharing it with you and feel free to share yours, too, in the comment section.
Sulk.
Allow yourself to sulk for some time. Feel the pain of that unrequited love. Cry if you must. You can cry only so long then you have to do something else with your time. Acknowledging and feeling the pain is important before you get past it.
Write it down.
Writing every single emotion you feel, even the littlest of feelings, can help you feel better and heal faster, big time! Once you are able to write it all down, you get a clearer picture of what exactly you’re going through.
Acceptance.
Accept the fact that they don’t love you the same way or that they can’t reciprocate the love you have for them. Once you accept that fact, you’re headed to the right path. It would be easier to go on living even when you’re the only one loving them.
Find a hobby.
Find something you love to do and as much as possible, something unrelated to that person. It won’t be very easy to stop your mind from thinking about that person but once you engage yourself deeply in creative or enjoyable hobbies, you gradually become less obsessed with the person and focus your mind elsewhere.
Enjoy whatever time you spend together.
Whatever/However you spend time together, keep in mind to focus on the good times, the good conversations, the good jokes, the good laughs, the good whatevers. Always only the good points. Enjoy the moment and don’t ask for more.
Go on dates with other people.
Since it happened, I haven’t dated anyone so I’m not very sure if this works but perhaps yes because you’ll be focusing your attention on other people. But it’s important to keep in mind not to look for this person from the other person you’re dating. That’s just not fair.
Protect yourself/your feelings.
If I were in this situation two, three years ago or so, I wouldn’t consider being friends with the person. But things change and so do people. So did I. Hence I’d say, it’s okay to be friends with this person. Keep the friendship. Be there for them when they need you without crushing your heart, of course. Be there when they need a helping hand but when things get difficult to handle, tell them or just leave.
Exercise.
Exercising contributes to emotional balance so do some workouts, walk, jog, or run. Play sports. You’d be shooting two birds at the same time — it removes the negativity in your mind and helps you stay fit.
Don’t be angry.
The thing is, I never get to learn how to be angry with this person. And I find that a good thing. So I’d say try to remember all the happy times you’re together, the wonderful times you’ve shared. I personally think there’s no point getting angry at someone because love didn’t grow in their hearts. I’m content and happy that love grew in mine. So be glad, it grew in yours, too.
This is a good one.
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Oh, thanks for reading, Mariam.🙂
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Inspiring words
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Thanks for reading. 🙂
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Excellent advice…
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Thanks for reading.☺️
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A very inspiring post. Wise words and advice.
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Thanks for reading, Sadje. 🙂
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You’re welcome 😉
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Exercising and new hobby really helped me to move on 😊
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Yeah, I think this is quite helpful for many.
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nice post
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Thank you.
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Reblogged this on WORLD OF CREATIVITY.
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Thank you for all the reblogs. I appreciate it.😊
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good day. thanks for your comment
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A very good post.
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Oh, thank you for taking some time to read. 😊
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My pleasure
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Reblogged this on The Reluctant Poet.
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Wow! Thank you! 😊😊😊
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Good tips.Nice post.
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Thanks for visiting my blog! 😊😊😊
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Provided some good advice!
Alot of times
We loves those that we can’t have
and those that loves us, we don’t want to have
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Right… thanks a lot for reading.😊
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Heartbreaks are good for the career and soul awakening. True indeed!
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Well, heartbreaks make us stronger…😊
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Welcome 😊
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Ur welcome
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Good one….I like the content of the post 👍👍
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Oh, I’m so glad you liked it, Himani! 😊 Thanks a lot!
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Great post indeed…I like the technique you use to overcome the problem of one sided love…keep writing my friend…your stuff is great ..
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Thanks a lot for reading, Sohair! 😊😊😊
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Welcome !
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Great post … well penned
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Such kind words, thank you! ☺️😊
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This is so deep but so true. I feel like this post is talking to me because I’m struggling with this right now. I’m still in the I refuse to be friends and spend time together phase. I’m going to take your advice to write my feelings down and stop being angry.
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I’m sad to hear that you’re experiencing this now but they say time heals all wounds… thanks for sharing and reading, I appreciate it a lot, Mariam! 💗 hope you feel a lot better soon!
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Pragmatic advice
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Better to be realistic, right?🙂 Thanks for reading!
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Hey! Hope you are doing great! I’ve nominated you for the 3 Days, 3 Quotes Tag. Would love for you to participate. (PS – No compulsion tho!) 🙂
http://iscriblr.com/3-days-3-quotes-tag-self-love/
Love and light! 🙂
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Hi, I’m doing great, thank you! And another thank you for another 3 Days, 3 Quotes Challenge! I still have to work on your first nomination of me ☺️ and I’d be glad to accept this second one. 😊 Please be patient but I would really love to do both! Thanks a lot!
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Haha.. Sure sweetie! Take your time. ❤
(I guess, I will have to make a journal for this too!) 😉
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I don’t mind getting nominated by the same person more than once! I like this challenge actually! Thank you! 😊
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Aww.. Thank you so much!❤
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Hmmm. I think that, unrequited love is just heartbreaking, you’ve described it pretty well. 🙂
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It is heartbreaking! Thanks for reading! 😊
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Great post! Indeed an eye opener for many! ❤
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Thanks a lot, Richa! 😊
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I enjoyed this post but I must say for someone like me point 7 and 9 are gonna be difficult.
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Oh, why? Well, we deal with such things in different ways and you probably have a deeper reason why it’s gonna be difficult… anyhow, I’m glad you enjoyed this post, thanks a lot for reading! Have a great day!
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I’ve been on both sides of the coin, on this one. The women who threw themselves at me, for whom I felt sincere friendship, sans amour, are still friends. The lady for whom I pined, way too soon after my wife of twenty-nine years passed, is also back to being a friend. She’s in a good marriage now, and I am comfortable in my own skin again. It all works out, if we let it.
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Right! 👍 Thanks a lot for reading and sharing! 😊
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This made me realised I’ve been looking for my ex from the new people in my life. What a mess I’ve made, but thanx for the reflection
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Thanks for reading! 😊
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