Sunshine Blogger Award #7

As usual, I’m very late for this again! I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long, Kavita! Thank you so much for the nomination, I do appreciate it a lot. Do visit her blog here (and thank me later) if you haven’t yet.

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I guess everyone knows the rules already. So I’ll just start answering the questions right away.

1. Museum or movie?

Definitely a museum! 🙂

2. Favorite author and why?

Haruki Murakami
https://electricliterature.com/haruki-murakami-to-pen-advice-column-for-fans-b8e9d3bf0648

I have several but Haruki Murakami definitely tops my list. Norwegian Wood is the very first book of his that I’ve read. It blew my mind! I have never read anything like that before, anything Murakami-like! Since then, my fascination of him and his books grew and I intend to read all his works.

3. Favorite music group?

Eraserheads, Green Day, The Beatles, Abba, Maroon 5, Bee Gees, Backstreet Boys. I can’t choose just one. 🙂

4. Favorite book?

Kafka on the Shore (and all Murakami books, actually), The Kite Runner, Stoner, A Little Life, The Book Thief, Unbroken and many more. There can’t only be one.

5. Do you write because you want to or because you have to?

Well, most of the time because I want to since writing is a very good outlet when I’m feeling too much (good or bad) and I write because I have to for the very same reason.

6. Why did you start blogging?

Boredom.

7. If you could live at any other time in history, when would it be and why?

I’d choose to live during the war years. I’ve read many books and articles and watched some documentaries about the war, it’s probably the worst years to live but well, I don’t know, I’m constantly drawn to the idea of living during those times whenever I’m asked. I also want to live during the years Jesus Christ was still on earth.

8. What is your favorite place to visit?

I enjoy visiting amusement parks, museums, zoos, bookstores, flea markets, thrift shops and libraries.

9. Favorite quote:

You don’t have to compromise convictions to be compassionate. ~Rick Warren

10. Library or sports arena?

Library! But I’d choose sports arena for a chance to see Roger Federer play! 😉

11. Famous person you admire most and why?

Ferdinand Marcos. He’s one heck of a president, very smart and polarizing. He can recite the 1935 & 1973 Philippine constitution. He’s the best president the Philippines’ ever had. There was discipline in the country during his regime. Economic growth and stability was better then. You can write a book about his achievements and what he has done for the country, unfortunately, more people choose to focus on the negative.

My nominees are:

https://pascaleshealingjourney.com/

https://handwritten427.wordpress.com/

https://omabdalrahmaan.wordpress.com/

https://imelma.wordpress.com/

https://introvertsoulsway.wordpress.com/

https://avoicefromiran.wordpress.com/

https://randomthoughts29056.wordpress.com/

https://wordsinthelight.com/

https://aethist.wordpress.com/

https://mariamshittu.com/

https://rothpoetry.wordpress.com/

The questions I’m looking forward for them to answer are:

  1. What is something popular that annoys you?
  2. What did you do on your last vacation?
  3. What’s your favorite number and why?
  4. What do you bring with you wherever you go?
  5. What smell brings back great memories?
  6. What are you best at?
  7. What TV series are you watching these days?
  8. What book are you currently reading?
  9. What was your first smart phone?
  10. Do you prefer traveling around or with a group?
  11. How do you plan to make the world a better place?

There you go! I hope the nominees would have the time to do this… And to everyone reading this, feel free to answer them, too!

Thanks again, Kavita! 🙂

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Quote of the Week

Lately I’ve been thinking about who I want to love, and how I want to love, and why I want to love the way I want to love, and what I need to learn to love that way, and who I need to become to become the kind of love I want to be…and when I break it all down, when I whittle it into a single breath, it essentially comes out like this: Before I die, I want to be somebody’s favorite hiding place, the place they can put everything they know they need to survive, every secret, every solitude, every nervous prayer, and be absolutely certain I will keep it safe. I will keep it safe.

~Andrea Gibson

8 Things You Should Stop Expecting from Others

Most people get upset when their expectations are not met. I guess it’s normal to feel that way for a while. However, for myself, I’ve learned that if you want to be happier, successful and have a stress-free (or less stressful) life, it’s very important not to expect anything from anyone specially things we too, are not willing to do for ourselves. We all are following different paths in life so it’s quite understandable when other people’s actions/behaviors don’t always align with ours.

Very often, many of our disappointments come from misguided, erroneous or even unwise expectations. True enough, it’s also hard not to expect anything in life, but we’ve seen it many times too, that life is not always what you’ve planned or wanted it to be. Moreover, people don’t always behave the way we want them to. We can always hope for the best but expect less or expect the worst.

So today, I thought it would be nice to share with you a few things I’ve learned to stop expecting from other people.

1. Stop expecting others to understand you.

This is one of the very first things I’ve stopped expecting from other people at an early age. It’s one of the most important things I did for myself. It helped me a great deal. As someone often branded as weird, strange, naughty, crazy or stubborn when I’m just being myself, I used to expect that someday people will understand me. Expecting others to understand me always leads me to disappointment though. It used to make me upset for hours or sometimes even lead to fights. But as soon as I’ve accepted the fact that I don’t need them to understand me because I very much understand myself, life has never been better. And I had always been the same weird, strange, naughty, crazy and (not so) stubborn (anymore) girl that I am.

It’s important to remember that not everyone will understand you and they don’t have to. You may be unwanted by some, but you may also be priceless for others. So always keep in mind your worth and spend your time with people who value you.

2. Stop expecting others to agree with you all the time.

People have different opinions about everything and it is very unrealistic to expect them to agree with you all the time. You can try to convince them to agree with you about the subject in hand but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they will concur with what you’ve said. Not everything that seems right to you is right for them, too. Opinions vary. So it’s perfectly fine if they don’t always agree with you, besides, you also don’t agree with them all the time, right?

3. Stop expecting people to return the favor.

The golden rule states that, “Do unto others what you want others to do unto you.” In reality, this isn’t always true. Not all people will show you kindness the way you show it to them. Many assholes and bitches who are not happy with themselves will treat you unkindly/cruelly despite the kindness you show them. So if you want to do favors to people, do it from your heart, do it because you want to without expecting that they’d do the same for you later on.

4. Stop expecting people to respect you when you don’t respect yourself.

While it is important to be nice to other people, it is also essential to be nice to yourself. Never beg people for respect, attention or love. You give yourself these things. Respect yourself, pay attention to yourself, love yourself. At the same time, respect others. They might not respect you as you respect them, but respect them anyway.

5. Stop expecting people to know what you’re thinking.

If you want to say something, tell them. Don’t expect others to know what’s in your mind. People can’t read minds. So you need to talk. You need to effectively communicate so people will understand and know what you want or what’s in your head. Just say it.

6. Stop expecting people to change overnight.

You can’t change people. I guess, you shouldn’t even try to. Personally, it’s either you accept them as they are or live without them. People change but that is totally up to them and when when they do without others forcing them to do so, it also changes the way  you see them.

7. Stop expecting people to live or do things according to your standards or your idea of who they are.

Allow people to be themselves and stop expecting them to act or behave according to your standards. Appreciate them and respect them for who they are. People’s morals and ethics differ. Right and wrong are not always clearly defined, so as long as you expect others to do things according to what you think is right will often leave you in frustration.

8. Stop expecting people to be always okay.

Every now and then, life throws a curve ball on us and sometimes, other people take far too long to cope with these difficulties. We deal with our problems in different ways and others suck at it sometimes but we all have good days and bad days. It’s okay not to be okay all the time. Have a little more compassion for others.

Damaged

She’s damaged as fuck

which makes her more dangerous.

Feels at home in hell.

Who Moved My Cheese by Spencer Johnson

whomovedmycheese

As someone who’s not for motivational self-help books, I was a bit reluctant to buy this but since I was on vacation and I needed something short and light to read, not to mention it’s cheap, I’ve decided to give it a go.

Nothing in this book is new to us. Insights on how we react or deal with the changes we face. The world changes whether we want it or not. The ideas are extremely important and useful, sure, but it’s just obvious common sense. I mean the book is okay, however, I’ve became so accustomed to change already which is probably why it didn’t create a huge impact on me. It doesn’t mean though that I’m good at dealing with it, no, but somehow, I’ve learned to expect it. I think that how it affects all of us differs depending on the situation we are in in life and how far we have been pushed when faced by change.

I’m not sure my bad mood affected how I thought about this book as I’ve read this from start to finish while in the tour van on the way back to Tbilisi with the most boring tour guide and tour group. Some people may enjoy reading this, some may not. And some should.

Quotable Quotes:

“What you are afraid of is never as bad as what you imagine. The fear you let build up in your mind is worse than the situation that actually exists.”

“He knew sometimes some fear can be good. When you are afraid things are going to get worse if you don’t do something, it can prompt you into action. But it is not good when you are afraid that it keeps you from doing anything.”

“Sometimes, things change and they are never the same again. This looks like one of those times. That’s life! Life moves on. And so should we.”

“What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”

Rating: 3/5 stars

Tbilisi

Quote of the Week

The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd – The longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world’s existence. All these half-tones of the soul’s consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are.

~Fernando Pessoa